last year's wishes are this year's apologies

As cliche as it sounds, I've been going over the idea of New Year's Resolutions, especially the half-hearted ones of the past. I think what strikes me most about them is this idea that the new year is a new start with new beginnings and all sorts of newness. Waking up today, I see that none of my problems or circumstances have changed at all. Today is exactly the same as yesterday, this year the same as last year. At least, thats the way it looks from a physical perspective. Wouldn't it be wonderful if there was some sort of reset button so that when the clock chimed midnight for 2009 all the mistakes and troubles of the last year were just erased? It's easy to think that things would be so much better that way, but you know, really, that wouldn't be any help at all. As much as I want to erase certain things and individuals from my past, I would be erasing the lessons learned at the same time. At least this way, I know what mistakes to avoid this time around, which I suppose is the point of New Year's Resolutions and newness in general. Last night, about an hour after the new year was born, I allowed myself to feel more frustration than I've been letting myself feel towards someone who used to be one of my best friends. I think that was the breaking point for this idea that nothing really changes as the year passes, except for our attitudes and actions. My feelings (good and bad) hadn't and won't change that easily, and that person's treating me like I don't exist anymore won't just automatically change either. People have to choose to change. We've got to be better than the petty arguments and grudges we allow to change us. I want to be better and to continually learn to be a better friend and I hope all my wonderful friends will hold me accountable for that. Thats what I want from newness.